Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
Randomize
