Joe is yelling at the trees again.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
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