hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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