I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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