When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Randomize
