i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize