I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Randomize
