I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
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