and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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