coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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