You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Randomize
