The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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