You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Randomize
