You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
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