I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize
