Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
