The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
is wine microwaveable?
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
