Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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