Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
