its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize
