wrigley field is MILF paradise
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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