he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
A+ Viking dick
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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