I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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