Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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