That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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