Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
