just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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