It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Randomize
