just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
