I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Randomize