how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize