Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
