am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
