I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
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