Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
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