Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
