You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
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