He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
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