so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize
