Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
