love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Randomize
