I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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