You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Randomize
