did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize