So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
a search helicopter?!
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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