It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Randomize
