She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Drake has all the answers
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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