Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize