My sheets look like a crime scene.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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