so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
